Thursday, November 12, 2015

Channel 13 Community Access TV Presents: BOOK STALKERS

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*A Collection of Antiquarian Curios & Relics*
"And he still gives his love, he just gives it away
The love he receives is the love that is saved
And sometimes is seen a strange spot in the sky
A human being given to fly . . ."
                                                    --PJ, Given to Fly

Channel 13 Community Access TV Presents:  BOOK STALKERS
(Camera pans Double D's basement.  Stoner Bill and Double D are seated behind a large newscaster's console in giant hedgehog costumes.)

Double D:  And so it begins.  Today marks the 5,101 day of the War on ChristmasTM.  And it doesn't look like there will be a truce any time soon.  "Fox News was our last, best hope for peace.  A self contained, echo chamber five blocks long, located in New York.  A place of misdirection and fabricated lies for millions of Americans and non-aliens.  A shining beacon in Manhattan . . .  all alone in the night.  It was the dawn of the Second Age of Mankind -- the year the War on ChristmasTM came upon us all.  This is the story of the last of the Fox News stations.  The year is 2015.  The name of the place is Fox News 47."

Stoner Bill:  Dude, that was . . . awesome.  You know I love me some Babylon 5.

Double D:  That was for you baby.  Also, the national stock for frankincense and myrrh are at historically low levels.  Coincidence?  I think not.  Fortunately, the foot soldiers over at Fox News are fighting the good fight.  Former Fox staple Glenn Beck has retold the St. Nick story in his own imitable way in The Immortal Nicholas (9781476798844) 26.99.  Personally, I'll stick with the stop-action Rankin & Bass cartoon.  (Stoner Bill laughs.)  Fox & Friends host and pretend historian Brian Kilmeade is re-writing the history books with his latest title, Thomas Jefferson and the Tripoli Pirates (9781591848066) 27.95.  And what would the Christmas season be like without another 'Killing' book from Bill O'Reilly?  This year we have his new one, Killing Reagan (9781627792417) 30.00, which is confusing since President Reagan wasn't killed.  But Mr. O'Reilly isn't one to let the truth get in the way of a good story.  I guess his next book will be Killing Bush Sr. Until then, we will have to settle for a real historian's take on the first Bush administration, Destiny and Power: The American Odyssey of George Herbert Walker Bush (9781400067657) 35.00 by Jon Meacham.  The first Bush seemed like a fairly reasonable man, and I suspect he would find this whole War on ChristmasTM screed rather silly.


Stoner Bill:  Silly!  Imagine if James Patterson's Merry Christmas, Alex Cross (9781455544943) 15.99 was actually titled Happy Holidays, Alex Cross.  I think you'd be the one feeling silly.  (Double D shakes his head.)  Hey, can you pass me my StarbucksTM coffee?  It's the one with the name 'Merry Xmas' on it.  

Odds & Sods

The Cloud Atlas guy, David Mitchell signed our entire stock of his quirky new title,
Slade House (9780812998689) 26.00.  We've already gone through about half of our stock.  As per usual, it's first come, first served . . .

For you history geeks, and I consider myself one also, Mary Beard's SPQR: A History of Ancient Rome (9780871404237) 35.00 looks like the real deal.  It's next on the docket after I finish William T. Vollman's Europe Central (9780143036593) 18.00, which is chock full of early 20th century European history . . .


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