*A Collection of
Antiquarian Curios & Relics*
"Our Gods
are dead. Ancient Klingon warriors slew them a millenia ago.
They were . . .
more trouble than they were worth . . ."
--Lt. Worf, Deep
Space Nine
STONER
BILL GOES TO HELL
Stoner Bill: Hey dudes and
dudettes! I'd like to welcome you to the 3rd Annual Heartland Fall
Forum Red Carpet Awards Show live on Book-TV from beautiful downtown Rosemont,
Illinois. Tonight the stars come out. I am getting a bit jostled
here, but I can see that the first limo has pulled in . . . Oh and look
who it is! It's rising star Daniel Alarcon, one of the New York Times 20
fiction authors under 40, and it looks like he has his Penguin publishing
entourage in tow.
Double D: Daniel's
new book At Night We Walk in Circles (9781594631719) 27.95 hasn't even
been released yet, but it's generating a lot of great book buzz.
Stoner Bill: By the way, my
good doctor, are we doing some kind of 'Bennifer' thing with the Random House
and Penguin Books merger. Like Ranguin? Or Penguin House? Or
. . . Oh my Lord!
(Suddenly the
ground in front of us cracks open and erupts with an enormous geyser of lava
and magma. There's a teeth-clenching roar as if a million poorly tuned
Harley-Davidson motorcycles all start as one machine. The moon disappears
and star after star quickly twinkles out. From this crack in the earth, a
50 foot high demon slowly rises through the heat and smoke until he stands
before us. People are running and screaming and falling into the gaping
maw of the pit.)
Stoner Bill: Duuude, I knew
Hyperion was planning on a big publicity push for Rick Riordan's House of
Hades (9781423146728) 19.99, but this is really getting out of hand . . .
Double D: Really?
C'mon Bill, this is obviously a publicity stunt for Chuck Palahnuik's Doomed
(9780385533034) 24.95 . . .
Satan: IDIOTS!
THE END IS NIGH! THE APOCALYPSE HAS COME!
Stoner Bill: Whoa! Hold
on there cowboy! I've been reading Mark Russell's God is Disappointed
in You (9781603090988) 19.95, which paraphrases The Bible in an irreverent
but faithful way. It removes the who begat who stuff, but it doesn't cut
out the illogical parts like Summer Glau did to the preacher's bible in Firefly.
(Thumbing through his copy.) So first of all, exactly how many seals have
been broken? It looks like you don't make an appearance until after the
fifth one.
(To be
continued)
Odds & Sods
Law enforcement
trainer, Lt. Dan Marcou is back! His new novel Destiny of Heroes (9781933272429)
16.95 has an international flavour. John Savage teams up with the FBI to
find an Al Quaeda operative in the US. Good clean fun.
As you probably
suspected, I am a bit of a Star Trek geek. So imagine my elation when I
discovered David Goodman's Star Trek Federation: The First 150 Years (9781781169155)
29.95, I would liken it to a nerdgasm. As soon as I saw that Victor
Bergman was name-checked as the chief astronomer at the Anderson Space Command,
(who is the science officer on Space: 1999), I knew this would be good . . .
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