*A Collection of Antiquarian Curios & Relics*
"Our Gods are dead. Ancient Klingon warriors slew them a millenia ago.
They were . . . more trouble than they were worth . . ."
--Lt. Worf, Deep Space Nine
STONER BILL GOES TO HELL
Stoner Bill: Hey dudes and dudettes! I'd like to welcome you to the 3rd Annual Heartland Fall Forum Red Carpet Awards Show live on Book-TV from beautiful downtown Rosemont, Illinois. Tonight the stars come out. I am getting a bit jostled here, but I can see that the first limo has pulled in . . . Oh and look who it is! It's rising star Daniel Alarcon, one of the New York Times 20 fiction authors under 40, and it looks like he has his Penguin publishing entourage in tow.
Double D: Daniel's new book At Night We Walk in Circles (9781594631719) 27.95 hasn't even been released yet, but it's generating a lot of great book buzz.
Stoner Bill: By the way, my good doctor, are we doing some kind of 'Bennifer' thing with the Random House and Penguin Books merger. Like Ranguin? Or Penguin House? Or . . . Oh my Lord!
(Suddenly the ground in front of us cracks open and erupts with an enormous geyser of lava and magma. There's a teeth-clenching roar as if a million poorly tuned Harley-Davidson motorcycles all start as one machine. The moon disappears and star after star quickly twinkles out. From this crack in the earth, a 50 foot high demon slowly rises through the heat and smoke until he stands before us. People are running and screaming and falling into the gaping maw of the pit.)
Stoner Bill: Duuude, I knew Hyperion was planning on a big publicity push for Rick Riordan's House of Hades (9781423146728) 19.99, but this is really getting out of hand . . .
Double D: Really? C'mon Bill, this is obviously a publicity stunt for Chuck Palahnuik's Doomed (9780385533034) 24.95 . . .
Satan: IDIOTS! THE END IS NIGH! THE APOCALYPSE HAS COME!
Stoner Bill: Whoa! Hold on there cowboy! I've been reading Mark Russell's God is Disappointed in You (9781603090988) 19.95, which paraphrases The Bible in an irreverent but faithful way. It removes the who begat who stuff, but it doesn't cut out the illogical parts like Summer Glau did to the preacher's bible in Firefly. (Thumbing through his copy.) So first of all, exactly how many seals have been broken? It looks like you don't make an appearance until after the fifth one.
(To be continued)
Odds & Sods
Law enforcement trainer, Lt. Dan Marcou is back! His new novel Destiny of Heroes (9781933272429) 16.95 has an international flavour. John Savage teams up with the FBI to find an Al Quaeda operative in the US. Good clean fun.
As you probably suspected, I am a bit of a Star Trek geek. So imagine my elation when I discovered David Goodman's Star Trek Federation: The First 150 Years (9781781169155) 29.95, I would liken it to a nerdgasm. As soon as I saw that Victor Bergman was name-checked as the chief astronomer at the Anderson Space Command, (who is the science officer on Space: 1999), I knew this would be good . . .