*A Collection of Antiquarian Curios & Relics*
"I am putting myself to the fullest use possible,
which is all I think that any conscious entity can ever hope to do . . ."
--HAL 9000, 2001: A Space Odyssey
FOX NEWS Presents their first reality show: WHITE MAN SCHEMING
It was a typical day in Bloomfield Hills. The traffic on Telegraph Road was a glut of Lexus and Mercedes. Most of the well-coiffed drivers were sipping lattes and talking to their hands-free phones on their way to their jobs in shiny skyscrapers. Since I'm on a reality show, I don't really work. Instead, I amble down to the local bookstore to sit in their cafe, drink coffee, and read the Detroit News. I overhear a lot of things:
Customer: I'm looking for a book about a happy black girl.
Bookseller: Huh? Oh, I bet you're referring to the NBA Young Literature winner Brown Girl Dreaming (9780399252518) 16.99 by Jacqueline Woodson.
My phone vibrates on the table and I answer, "Yo!"
It's my friend Mick from Partners; he replies, "What's up dog?"
I say, "What's hot in books? And not necessarily for the holidays, I got some birthdays coming up."
"Well, yeah, there are quite few surprise titles that I think will sell after Christmas."
I correct him, "The holidays."
"Whatever. Ann Patchett is touting a book on the trapped Chilean miners Deep Down Dark (9780374280604) 26.00 for NPR's new book club. We should have stock on Monday. It's written by Hector Tobar . . ."
I interject, "Isn't he the big, bald guy in Plan 9 From Outer Space?"
"Not even close, that's Tor Johnson. Also, this computer geek David Pogue came out of nowhere with his book, Pogue's Basics (9781250053480) 19.99. It looks like we won't get any more copies until right after Christmas . . ."
"No, literally after Christmas. I think I'm allowed to say that. The news isn't so good for Laura Ingalls Wilder's Pioneer Girl (9780984504176) 39.95. The publisher is out until mid-January."
I ask, "With all the kerfuffle over the new Seth Rogen flick, I'd be interested to read something on Best Korea."
"It's funny you should mention that," Mick chuckled. There's a new book by Suki Kim, a former teacher in North Korea called Without You, There Is No Us (9780307720658) 24.00 . . ."
"Mick, hang on for a second, I gotta hear this one."
Customer: Do you have any childrens books on serial killers?"
Bookseller: . . .
Odds & Sods
Our lovable scamp is back! Coast Guard mascot Onyx has returned in a new title called The Mighty Mackinaw (9780989284646) 14.99 by Tyler Benson. The latest in the 'Adventures of Onyx', this one has the black Labrador retriever ('Find me a Labrador and I'll retrieve it.') on-board for the arrival of the Christmas Tree Ship in Chicago. It is guaranteed to be a holiday favourite for years to come . . .
Tom Daldin's Under The Radar Michigan (9780991602100) 24.95, which is based on the Emmy Award-winning PBS series, is back in stock. Michiganders will not believe what is in their own backyard!