Ye Olde Partners
Page
*A Collection of
Antiquarian Curios & Relics*
" I guess the
rule here is money is free speech, unless that
money speaks with a funny accent . . ."
-Jon Stewart
commenting on Megyn Kelly and Clinton Cash (9780062369284) 27.99
Dearest Mick--
Chip, my loyal manservant, and I
had returned early from one of Sheldon Adelson's Super PAC parties in Las Vegas
when we found your parcel post package outside my villa's security gate.
(As an aside, when did politics become so unseemly? Mr. Adelson was no
better than a muppet with money. And when I say 'muppet', I am not
referring to the adorable Jim Henson puppets, but the archaic British definition
of the word.) We decided to open a bottle of Bordeaux Chateau Mouton
Rothschild 1982 and peruse the contents of your box.
I was tickled to see Chip pull
out a copy of Laura Ingalls Wilder's Pioneer Girl (9780984504176)
39.95. You may not be aware that I courted Miss Ingalls when I worked as
a stock boy at the Oleson's General Store in Walnut Grove. In fact, our
relationship had become so serious that we began bundling on the
weekends. Unfortunately, Almanzo Wilder reared his ugly head and the rest
is, as they say, history.
I did have Chip read Willie
Nelson's It's a Long Story (9780316403559) 30.00 to me before
responding in this letter. I was not entirely sure how much his
continuous consumption of the marihuana had addled his brain. Apparently,
a lot. There is no mention of me bailing Willie out of debt in the 1980s,
or anything about our trip across America on the train The City of New
Orleans. I was very disappointed. I did not want to do this, but I
have asked Chip to remove him from our Christmas card list.
I also see that you have included
my good friend James Patterson's 14th Deadly Sin (9780316407021) 28.00,
which was actually written by Maxine Paetro. I remember when Mr.
Patterson first hit the bestseller lists and he said to me, "Charlie, I
can't keep up with the pace. The publisher wants a new book every six
months!" And I said, "Calm down. You just need to find
yourself a good ghost writer and that way you will have more time to work on
your tennis game." (And his game has not improved one whit.)
As for Kim Kardashian's Selfish
(9780789329202) 19.95, which you've seen fit to include in your selection, I
can picture you snickering to yourself as you placed it in the box.
However, I do not believe one could produce a more appropriate title for her
book. I will leave it at that.
Warmest Regards,
Sir Charles Edmund Wilson III
Odds
& Sods
I believe
everyone has heard the story of the three women in Cleveland who were held
captive in a House of Horrors for nearly ten years. John Glat tells their
amazing story in The Lost Girls (9781250036360) 26.99. Monsters do
walk amongst us . . .
There is a new
biography on legendary MSU basketball coach Tom Izzo and it's called
Mr. March (9781597255714)
34.95 by the Lansing State Journal and the Detroit Free Press. It is a
short discount (30%) and non-returnable, but stock is limited. Go
Green! Go White!
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