B. Traven Jr.

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*A Collection of Antiquarian Curios & Relics*

"Imagination is the parallel universe of the writer.  If he is not responding to you

in this world, he is probably responding to someone in the imaginary world . . ."

                       --Heenashree Khandelwal

B. Traven Jr. here.  You may remember me as the host of the History Channel's B. Traven Jr. Presents X-treme Ancient Alien Conspiracy Mysteries or for my day job as the Chief Exarch of Media Permutations from the 23rd century.  Ha, ha!  However, you may not be aware that in addition to traveling up and down in time, I can also travel to various alternate universes.  Yes, I know, it's a lot of ground to cover.  Recently, I was puzzled when yet another unpublished Dr. Seuss book was discovered and Random House mentioned they were going to release What Pet Should I Get? (9780553524260) 17.99 on July 28.  I decided to take a little trip to the alternate universe that I like to call Seussland.  (Yes, there is a universe where Dr. Seuss has been crowned World Overlord for Life, and he is still alive through the magic of a variety of unwieldy medical contraptions.) Here goes . . .

I went to visit Phineas Honeydew

He was watching his TeeVeedoo

On it was a movie called Notwork

Howard Beale was doing his spiel

He screamed so loud it made my ears hurt:

Howard Beale: . . . So I want you to get up now.  I want all of you to get out of your chairs.  I want you to upstairs.  Go past the Who-Bubs in the hall.  I know there are books like Knightin-Snail (9780312577223) 27.99 by Kristin Hannah, or A Spool of Hool Thread (9781101874271) 25.95 by Anne Tyler to distract you, but don't let them distract you at all.  Find the pile of wonderous-smelling stacks.  Find Dr. Seuss' books in the breakfast nook.  Grab them and climb onto the Hippo-Heimers' back.  And then go to the toppest blue space!  The official Katroo Birthday Sounding-Off Place!  Come on!  Open your mouth and sound off at the sky!  Shout loud at the top of your voice: "I'M HAPPY AS HELL, AND I LOVE DR. SEUSS!"

 

A million screaming maniacs tossed their books into the air

And without any fanfare, a crinkly light grew in the sky.

I heard a loud POP! and then all their books disappeared!

Where had they gone?  But I already knew and I just sighed . . .

Meanwhile back in Ashland, Ohio, while rummaging through a trunk in the attic and looking for his book, Ready Player One (9780307887443) 14.00 by Ernest Cline, Tommy Smith finds a treasure trove of books that have magically appeared.  He shouts, "Hey Mom, I found five more Dr. Seuss manuscripts up here!"

Odds & Sods

Whoa-nelly!  It looks like we have ourselves a bumper crop of Chiller books for the youngins a-comin'!  In April, Jonathan Rand's new title Michigan Chillers #17: A Ghostly Haunting in Grand Haven (9781893699441) 5.99 releases.  And boy, is it a humdinger!  In May, we have Freddie Fernortner #13: Day of the Dinosaurs (9781893699175) 4.99 comin' in for the youngest sprouts.  Finally, in June, we'll have a release from his most popular series, American Chillers #42: North Carolina Night Creatures (9781893699519)  5.99.  Well, what ya waitin' fer?  Crank up yer speakin' telegraph and backorder your copies today!

  

BOOK STALKERS

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*A Collection of Antiquarian Curios & Relics*

"I wish most sincerely there was not a slave in this province.  It always appeared

 a most iniquitous scheme to me -- to fight ourselves for what we are daily robbing

and plundering from those who have as good a right to freedom as we have . . ."

                                                                                     --Abigail Adams

Announcer:  Due to time constraints, we join the following program in progress.

Channel 13 Community Access TV Presents:  BOOK STALKERS

(Camera pans Double D's basement.  Stoner Bill and Double D are dressed in immobile pagoda outfits with their heads poking out of the top.)

Stoner Bill:  Thanks so much for stopping by, Mr. Scott McCloud.  We really enjoyed your new comic book, The Sculptor (9781596435735) 29.99.

Scott McCloud:  (Getting visibly angry)  How many times do I have to tell you?!  It is not a comic book!  It's a graphic novel!  Are you really that dense?!

Stoner Bill:  Whoa!  Calm down, comic book dude!

Double D:  Looking ahead at next week's show, we have Jenny Ritchie, author of I Make Milk, What's Your Super Power? (9781619272323) 17.99, which is on breastfeeding.  Hey Bill, what's your super power?

Stoner Bill:  Friendship.  I can get along with anyone.  And lung capacity.

Double D:  Yeah, we just saw that in action.  We'll also have the author of Never Fade (9781423159339) 9.99, Alexandra Bracken . . .

Stoner Bill:  Release the Bracken!

Double D:  Really?  Is this a bit?  If you're going to do a bit, you need to give me some kind of a head's up, especially if you're making a reference to Liam Neeson in Clash of the Titans.  Personally, I preferred him as Oskar Schindler.

Stoner Bill:  It wasn't meant to be a bit.  I could have quoted from one of the Taken movies.  Or E.L. James' Fifty Shades of Grey (9780804172073) 15.95.

 (Suddenly, Scott McCloud rushes on stage and crashes into Double D's pagoda which topples into Stoner Bill's pagoda.  Like dominoes, they fall, and neither host can move beyond flailing their arms around wildly while on the floor.  They look like turtles flipped on their backs.)

Scott McCloud:   (Screaming)  It. is. not. a freakin' comic book!

Odds & Sods

 

Last week, I claimed we had a new edition of Larry Wagenaar and Izzi Bendall's Historic Michigan Travel Gde. (9781880311110) 7.95.  I was wrong.  In my defense, they are co-written by the same author, they both showcase places of historical interest in Michigan, and they are setup in a similar format.  The new one is actually the 14th edition of the Michigan History Directory (9781880311127) 19.95 by Larry Wagenaar & Nancy Feldbush.  I apologize for any confusion . . .

 

Update:  The reprint for Pioneer Girl (9780984504176) 39.95 by Laura Ingalls Wilder is due here the first week of March.  Backorder accordingly. 

Ye Olde Partners Page

Ye Olde Partners Page

*A Collection of Antiquarian Curios & Relics*

"As her young man dies,

On a cold and gray Chicago mornin',

Another little baby child is born

In the ghetto . . ."

                                                      --Mac Davis, In the Ghetto

1)  HEARTBREAK HOTEL . . .  Harper Lee.  There is no single title author who has had more impact on American society than Harper Lee and her To Kill a Mockingbird (9780446310789) 8.99.  Shockingly, the publisher announced last week that they will be releasing a long lost manuscript of a sort of sequel, Go Set A Watchman (9780062409850) 27.99 on July 14 with a 2 million copy first print.  (Oh, those will be collectible.)  This will be huge.  Readers are going back to re-read her first novel, and it has already produced a noticeable upward tick in sales.  As usual with Harper Lee, controversy is swirling around not only how the book was found, but if she is even cognizant enough to sign-off on its release.  (Ms. Lee is not in the best of health.)  In a way, it is a testament to our industry that people are questioning the ethics and morality in releasing a title that her literary executor and her sister Alice, who recently died, had been sitting on for nearly 60 years.  I'm sure we will be hearing more about this one in the days to come . . .

 

 2)  CAN'T HELP FALLING IN LOVE . . .  Only something as big as a new novel by Harper Lee could overshadow the release of a new Oprah Book Club 2.0 title.  Yesterday, Oprah announced that Ruby (9780804188241) 16.00 by Cynthia Bond is her new title.  This is the first book from Ms. Bond, who is 53 years old and has taught writing to the homeless and at-risk youths for the past 15 years.  Oprah has gone all-in on this title by purchasing both the film and television rights, so expect her to hammer this one home . . .

 3)  IN THE GHETTO . . .  The Grammys produced more than its fair share of headlines this year.  Lost in the controversy surrounding Zack Braff's incredibly racist tweet was Pharrell's own social commentary in his Grand Budapest Hotel-style production number for his hit song Happy.  As we all know too well, there was a reason the dancers were wearing hoodies and holding their arms up behind him.  Obliquely, this touches upon the theme in Jill Leovy's Ghettoside (9780385529983) 28.00.  African-American males are 6% of our country's population, yet they account for 40% of the homicides in America.  Most often the murderers are black men and they are never brought to justice.  They usually occur in the poorest part of our cities where, unfortunately, the police are spread too thin to make much difference.  For example, Ms. Leovy focuses on the murder of a teen in Watts and the attempt of one cop to bring the perpetrators to justice.  We really should be talking about this, and not Kanye West's latest stupid remarks . . . 

     

Odds & Sods 

Hotdog!  The new edition of Larry Wagenaar and Izzi Bendall's Historic Michigan Travel Guide (9781880311110) 7.95 is finally here.  There are so many cool places to visit in here.  If you're looking for a respite from the Michigan winter blahs, this is your book . . .

We were saddened to learn that Colleen McCullough passed away recently.  You may recall the Australian born author wrote The Thorn Birds (9780380018178) 7.99, which became a mega-hit mini-series starring Richard Chamberlain.  She had also written a well-respected Roman history series.  She will be missed . . .