*A Collection of
Antiquarian Curios & Relics*
"Soon, if we are not prudent, millions of people will be watching each other starve to death through expensive television sets . . ." --Aneurin Bevan
FROM
THE MIND OF NICK FOX
THE CREATOR OF
CHICAGO P.D. & CHICAGO FIRE
COMES THE
EXCITING NEW SHOW . . . CHICAGO LIBRARY
(Scene
one: A stereotypical Mafiaoso leans over a library desk, menacingly.)
Mafia guy: Hey, li'l
library lady, it has come to the attention of the Montague family that you are
behind on your payments. It really would be a shame if some unforeseen
'accident' happened to your card catalogue.
Library lady: What? Are
you threatening me?
Mafia guy: Threatening?
I'm just saying you got a nice lookin' Dewey Decimel System here. I would
hate to see them get all mixed up. Comprende?
Library lady: Sssssshhhh!
Mafia guy: What!? Are
you shushin' me? Really. Are you #$%#@$ shushin' me? I come
in here tryin' to help you out and you're *&%$# shushin' me! I'll
burn this $#%&% place to the ground! It'll be a %$#@&
fireball! [He notices a stack of books on the counter and begins knocking
them off one by one.] Oops, there goes Doris Kearns Goodwin's The
Bully Pulpit (9781416547860) 40.00. Looks like I just dinged a
corner. Oh no, there goes John Grisham's Sycamore Row (9780385537131)
28.95. I am so clumsy. Watch out below, here comes James
Patterson's Cross My Heart (9780316210911) 29.00 . . .
Library lady: Enough!
Get out of my library right now!
Mafia guy:
(Laughing) Head's up! Here comes Charles Krauthammer's Things
That Matter (9780385349178) 28.00 . . .
Library lady: That's it!
[She lays her glasses down on her desk, unties her hair bun, and in one fluid
motion she leaps into the air, performs a 'Buffy the Vampire Slayer' backflip
in midair, and lands behind the interloper. With one hand she begins to
crush his windup and with her other one she begins to snap the fingers of his
right hand in succession. She whispers in his ear.] Don't *snap*
ever *snap* come *snap* in *snap* here again. Comprende?
(Watch for Chicago
Library on ABC-TV this Spring)
Odds
& Sods
Former Detroit Red
Wing Darren McCarty's My Last Fight (9781600788857) 26.95 will be
delivered here on Monday. Get your backorder in . . .
Speaking of
sports, we have a boatload of Donald Driver's Driven (9780385349147)
25.00 back in stock. It looks like the winner of the NFL's Norris
division will come down to the final game between the Chicago Bears and the
Green Bay Packers . . .
Errata:
Malcolm Gladwell's appearance at The Michigan Theatre for David &
Goliath (9780316204361) 29.00 is actually on January 27 and not on December
11 as originally announced here . . .
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